Thursday, December 10, 2009
Spread the news
I need readers. If I have readers, then I will become the most famous blog in the whole world, the female Perez Hilton and I'll have to wear bright pink suits with neon sunglasses, die my hair different colors and then I'll get to travel to every award show around the world. Yes, that would be the life because award shows are awesome. So, if you're reading this, tell your friend, and then he will tell his friend, who will tell her Mom, who will in turn tell her sister, then the sister will tell her friend, who will tell her Grandmother, who will tell her whole Bingo Club, and the President of the Bingo Club will happen to be the Grandfather of Mark Zuckerberg (Yeah, the guy who created Facebook). Then Mark Zuckerberg will announce to the press that he bought my blog for $4 million, I will get to do exclusive celebrity interviews, get invited to all the hippest parties, and be able to hire people to write my blog for me because I will be too busy to blog. So instead, I will start vlogging and become the face of Zucaritas (Yes, that is Spanish frosted flakes). They will replace Tony the Tiger with me, then I'll get a book deal about my life, go on Celeb-reality, that will then lead to Celebrity Sober House, my career will sink, but then I will create a blog again, and OD after the first post.